The Personal Statement for the University of California
"In reading your application, we want to get to know you as well as we can. There’s a limit to what grades and test scores can tell us so we ask you to write a personal statement.
Your personal statement—consisting of responses to two prompts—is your chance to tell us who you are and what’s important to you. Think of it as your opportunity to introduce yourself to the admissions and scholarship officers reading your application. Be open, be honest, be real. What you tell us in your personal statement gives readers the context to better understand the rest of the information you’ve provided in your application.
A couple of tips: Read each prompt carefully and be sure to respond to all parts. Use specific, concrete examples to support the points you want to make. Finally, relax. This is one of many pieces of information we consider in reviewing your application; an admission decision will not be based on your personal statement alone.
Instructions
Respond to both prompts, using a maximum of 1,000 words total.
You may allocate the word count as you wish. If you choose to respond to one prompt at greater length, we suggest your shorter answer be no less than 250 words.
Stay within the word limit as closely as you can. A little over—1,012 words, for example—is fine.
Prompt #1 (freshman applicants)
Describe the world you come from – for example, your family, community or school – and tell us how your world has shaped your dreams and aspirations.
Prompt #1 (transfer applicants)
What is your intended major? Discuss how your interest in the subject developed and describe any experience you have had in the field – such as volunteer work, internships and employment, participation in student organizations and activities – and what you have gained from your involvement.
Prompt #2 (all applicants)
Tell us about a personal quality, talent, accomplishment, contribution or experience that is important to you. What about this quality or accomplishment makes you proud and how does it relate to the person you are?
Tips and Techniques
Start early.
Allow time for reflection, thoughtful preparation, and revision.
Choose a topic for each essay.
Look critically at the information in your application: your grades, awards, activities and work experience, family and income. Anticipate questions an admissions evaluator will have after reading your application. The personal statement is your opportunity to answer those questions.
Compose your personal statement in a word-processing program.
Don't type it directly into the application. This way, you will have the opportunity to print copies for review.
Write in a natural style.
Present your information and ideas in a focused, thoughtful and meaningful manner. Support your ideas with specific examples. A personal statement that is simply a list of qualities or accomplishments is usually not persuasive.
Proofread.
In addition to checking your spelling, be sure your grammar is correct and your essays read smoothly.
Solicit feedback.
Your personal statement should reflect your own ideas and be written by you alone, but others--family and teachers--can offer valuable suggestions.
Copy and paste.
Once you are satisfied with your essays, save them in plain text (ASCII) and paste them into the space provided in the application. Proofread once more to make sure no odd characters or line breaks have appeared. (If you submit a paper application, attach a copy of your personal statements. In the upper right corner of each page, write your name and date of birth, and the words "Personal Statement.")
Ask advice of whomever you like, but do not plagiarize from sources in print or online, and do not use anyone's published words but your own."
Writing your application essay/personal statement
HOW TO WRITE YOUR COLLEGE APPLICATION ESSAY
Your application essay can be a crucial factor in your admission to the college of your choice, especially if you are marginally admissible. Above all, your essay needs to be a well-organized, clearly presented, and carefully proofread piece of your best writing.
Important points to keep in mind as you are writing your college admissions essay:
•Give yourself plenty of time to think about your topic, to outline your main ideas, and to write and rewrite rough drafts. Don’t procrastinate and throw something together at the last minute! Always have a good writer (like your English teacher, not your best friend) look over your essay for spelling and grammar mistakes.
•Use your own voice and a natural writing style. Don’t try to impress admissions officers with how many words you can pull from your thesaurus or how you can affect an artificial tone that you think makes you sound like someone they want to admit.
•Be honest. Don’t enhance your essay with false accomplishments or life experiences that you really didn’t have. Admissions officers want to admit a diverse student body with an interesting mix of students. Who you really are is more important to them than someone you “invented”.
•Be careful what you write about. Expounding on your political or religious beliefs can put readers off, especially if they are “on the other side” of your issue. If you are writing about an extremely personal issue, come from the angle of how you grew as a person from that experience. Don’t reveal things that will embarrass you or make your readers feel uncomfortable. Don’t imply that they should admit you because you’ve had a miserable life and they should feel sorry for you. Don’t whine.
•Do not rehash information that is listed elsewhere on your application. The essay should not be a “grocery list” of your awards, grades, and activities. Those are usually listed on another part of the college application. The personal essay is a chance to reveal who you really are as a unique person, show your special talents in their best light, and/or tell why you would be an asset to the college.
•Write about the topic that the specific college asks for in its essay instructions. Some colleges have very specific topics and can tell if you are using an essay that you wrote for another college because you were too lazy to address their topic. Some colleges use very open-ended questions that can be used for other colleges, especially if they will accept the Common Application. Read the instructions carefully before you put a lot of effort into writing an essay that is not appropriate for a particular college.
•Grab the reader’s interest from your first sentence. Starting an essay with,
“My name is...” or other boring beginnings can kill an overburdened reader’s interest in you right away. Make your essay stand out from the pile by having a great opening.
But, what should I write about in my personal statement?
If you are given an open-ended topic such as, “Tell us about yourself” or “Write about something that is important to you”, you may feel daunted and not know where to begin. Remember, that your main objective is to reveal yourself as a person and to show admissions officers that you can write well and logically. Although some colleges have unique essay topics, many more tend to fall into a few categories such as:
*If you could have dinner (or meet, or talk) with any person in history or fiction, whom would you choose and why?
*Describe one of your possessions or your room at home and explain what it says about you.
*Tell us about the one event or experience in your life that has had the greatest effect on you and explain why.
*Which person in your own life or in history has had the greatest influence on you?
*Why do you want to go to college (or to our college)?
If you have given yourself plenty of time to plan, you might consider writing an essay on each one of these topics. Even if the colleges you choose to apply to don’t use these questions, it will give you practice in writing and in sorting our your feelings and ideas.
Remember that people love to hear stories. Telling a story about yourself is instantly engaging. Admissions officers know that eighteen year old seniors cannot pontificate on deep philosophical ideas--you haven’t had enough life experience yet! Neither are they interested in your ideas on how to “fix” the world’s problems, why they should convert to your religion, or where you went to kindergarten and elementary school. If you are going to introduce yourself, it is better to reveal yourself anecdotally than to tell your entire life story. Telling a story about a single incident that shows your character is much more effective than using generalities such as, “I have always been a good student, I am active in my community, and I am a well-rounded person.” Showing yourself in a single moment in time where you did some thing that you were proud of, or even where you failed miserably but learned from the experience is very compelling.
To begin planning your essay, ask yourself these questions to “tune in” to yourself as a person: Whom do I most admire? What do I enjoy doing in my free time? What am I really good at? Of what accomplishment am I most proud? What are my greatest weaknesses? Why do my friends like me? What would I like to change about myself? What do I see myself doing ten years from now? How do I want to have an impact on my world? What talents would I like to acquire or enhance? What have I learned from jobs I have held? What is unique about my family? What would I like to do that I have not had the opportunity to do yet? If I had nothing holding me back, and were guaranteed success at whatever I chose to do, what would I like to do with my life?.......... Why don’t you do that anyway? Looking inward is the best place to start writing that essay to get you into college!
Applying to College
Applying to College
Now begins the great adventure of applying to college! Here is a list of guidelines to help you through the application process:
If you are applying to a four- year college or university:
Make sure you take your SAT or ACT tests in October, November, or December. Some colleges (like San Diego State) want tests taken by November! If you are applying to any of the Universities of California or other very selective colleges, you also need to take two SAT Subject Tests in subjects of your choice.
If you have been in the United States for less than three years of school, you may also need to take the TOEFL test. Check the catalog of the colleges to which you are applying to see if you need to take the TOEFL. Applications are available in the College Center.
Most colleges accept or even prefer that you apply online on the internet. Our school’s website, www.hollywoodhighschool.net has many links to college websites and search engines to help you in your college quest. The internet is the fastest, most efficient way to explore college options and apply to college. Before you begin applying to college, see Ms. Campbell to get your academic transcript that lists all your classes and grades that you will fill in on your college applications.
UC ‘s and CSU’s want you to apply online. You can reach their websites through our school’s website. From www.hollywoodhighschool.net, go under “counseling”, then under “college counselor” to reach all college-related links. If you are applying to any other private or out-of-state colleges, you must contact those colleges (online is the easiest way) and ask for an application for admission, or fill out their online application.
When you get your applications for admission to private colleges, look for a page entitled SCHOOL REPORT or SECONDARY SCHOOL REPORT. This is the page that you give to Ms. Campbell or your counselor right away to fill out for you. Read it carefully to see what it requests. Fill out the top line of the School Report with your name, social security number, and any other information that they request, sign the waiver, then give it to Ms. Campbell or your counselor along with a BRAG SHEET (available in 404) and a copy of your personal essay for that college or an autobiography. Remember that the more complete your Brag Sheet is, the better your letters of recommendation will be.
Private College applications will probably also ask you for teacher recommendations. Be sure to give your teachers plenty of time to write these recommendations for you and also give them a stamped envelope addressed to the college to which it is to be sent. Also let your teachers know when your application is due. Teachers will send their letters separately to the college---don't wait for teachers to hand you their letter of recommendation--it is supposed to be confidential. Do not ask teachers to write letters for Cal State or UC or community college admissions, although you may need them later to apply for specific scholarships to those schools.
Pay very close attention to application and scholarship deadlines. Make sure that you have completed all the forms and have mailed them at least a week before they are due. To have proof that you have mailed them on time, get a CERTIFICATE OF MAILING from the post office when you mail them, unless you are completing the whole application online.
Please have all requests for letters of recommendation and School Report forms into Ms. Campbell and your teachers before Thanksgiving, unless you are applying early--then follow "the sooner, the better" motto.
The time to apply to CSU’s is during October and November, and to UC’s is in the month of November. Most UC’s are very strict about their November 30 deadline and will not accept applications after that date. Most private colleges have either December, January, or February deadlines. Read your applications very carefully to make sure that you meet their application deadlines. Some private colleges have “rolling admissions”—that means that as long as they have space in their freshman class, they will keep accepting applications.
If you are applying to Community Colleges, you do not need to take SAT’s or ACT’s, or have letters of recommendation. If you are graduating in June, you apply to community colleges in March, April, or May or sooner. If you are graduating sooner, check with Mrs. Campbell about application deadlines for community colleges.
Especially during the Fall, there will be frequent visits from college representatives. Be sure to read the bulletins, visit our website, listen to PA announcements, and notice the signs posted in the quad to keep abreast of college rep visits to the College Center. The representatives that visit our campus are the ones who read your application, so come in and meet them and make a good impression by asking them questions that you have about their respective campuses.
Be sure to keep a folder or some sort of filing system for all your college correspondence. It is a good idea to make copies of all the important applications that you send. Use Certificates of Mailing to prove that you mailed test registrations, college applications and scholarship applications on time.
Be wary of mail from companies that may come to your house offering to help you find scholarships for a fee. You never have to pay anyone to get information about college, scholarships, or financial aid. If you get anything suspicious, bring it to Ms. Campbell to look over.
Attention, Seniors Applying to Cal States!
Now that you have applied to the CSU's by the November 30 deadline, and probably have filled out your EOP applications, the next step is taking your EPT (English Placement Test) and ELM (Entry Level Math) tests. The only way that you are exempt from taking these tests is if you took the EAP test last year when you took your CST test and scored high enough to be deemed ready for college level classes, OR if you scored a 550 or higher on either the Critical Reading or Math section of the SAT reasoning test (NOT a combined score!), OR if you got a 3 or higher on the AP English Language exam or the AP Calculus Exam, OR took a college level English or math class and got a C or higher. Otherwise you HAVE to take the EPT/ELM test by the deadline of the campus to which you are applying (for CSULA it's Jan 30; for CSUN it's March 14). You can take the exam at a campus that is convenient to your home and have your scores sent to other campuses. I have a link to the CSULA and CSUN registration pages on the links section of my website. The sooner you take these tests, the better. You can go to www.csumentor.edu or the testing link on each Cal State website to find sample test questions in order to prepare you to do well on these tests. If you have any questions, contact the campus testing office or ask Ms. Campbell.
